Sunrise in Almora

Traveling together is a benchmark of compatibility. I know at least five dating couples who decided to move in together as they found they were still pining for each other at the end of each trip. More than onism dawning, it is the realisation that you have made some ground together. Yes, if anything can go wrong, it will when you are tripping together – trapped together, literally, for days on end. Across flights and ships, buses, trains and cars, over several thousand kilometres, many different cultures and peoples, types of food and ideas of fun. Over shared adventures and mishaps, destinations and budgets. If anything needs to be concealed trust it to wriggle its way out there. Or spring out like a nasty surprise when you least expect. A possibly harmless glance at a shapely or muscled person, getting caught checking out an ex’s social media page, leaving hair on soap, forgetting to flush…the list is as endless as Lord Byron’s fetishes.

The choice of destination is not that important, really. If a visit to the Taj Mahal could strengthen a relationship, I know umpteen couples who wouldn’t have broken up. And I would also bring my folks for a re-visit; not that they have parted ways. At least not yet. Of late – nearing the septuagenarian zone – they do tend to find the idea increasingly tempting though. Or maybe it is the Taj which keeps them together which they visited from Kerala on their honeymoon during the era just after black and white photography when the grey areas were covered blue, green or orange. Or a visit to Orchha should mean the end of romance – one couple were so moved by this bunch of ornate cenotaphs by the Betwa that they decided to move in together upon return. Burial also denotes new beginnings. It is largely about how you want to look at it. Visiting Vrindavan and spending whole evenings with the God of Love maybe endows you with such an abundance of the emotion that I have seen new pairings happen between entry and exit gates. This German acquaintance left her traveling partner from Munich for a much older beau within the duration of the same evening of song and dance. They lived together in Rishikesh for many years afterwards. 

It is about spending time together. Discovering not just the place and its people but each other. That bony ass can be blamed on long hours behind the wheel. Or you are burping with all the steadiness of a water wheel because the road is winding and the car is going too fast. Your extravagant tippling and unreasonable bellicosity is all because of lack of oxygen in the high altitudes. Or, the mouldy walls of the heritage home is so depressing that you are deriving succour from your devices. Of course, I am kidding. But the whole point is about conceding and digesting uncomplimentary characteristics about each other.

A slightly extended weekend and we decided on Almora – tucked into the Kumaon Hills of Uttarakhand, about 400 km from Delhi. The hour-long traffic snarl at Ghaziabad and we began wondering, silently at first, about a lot of things – appropriateness of the choice of destination, our propensity to joyously oversleep, the utility of guidebooks in general and even car condition. In short, everything just short of what we were doing with each other. Let me add here that an earlier much anticipated trip to the Taj Mahal was a fiasco with only one of us making to the destination – in a different car. It took us the whole of half a day to reach Almora and find out that the accommodation that came highly recommended was actually the namesake. 

The original one had more character and story. It was bequeathed to a local mechanic by the English owners – the guy who painstakingly mended their sputtering vehicle. Probably a due reward but for other variants of the version including conning and mysterious disappearances. Every property in the hills have a story if you are looking for one. The gorier ones always come from the nearest competition. Our reservation came under ‘heritage home’ – whose condition reminded me of my first bicycle which I customised to resemble a rally devil with a lot of white paper cutouts glued across the chainbox. It was a casualty of over-ambition and limited means. Soon after arrival we were invited to a party by a servile manager. Mutton biriyani and free flowing alcohol were promised in abundance. The usual resfeber had woken me early that morning; the long hours on the road and I could just curl up and sleep on the bowl. While we decided to give it a miss, it seemed like the rest of the guests accepted it with gusto – the racket went on till wee hours. Whose idea was this bother? Why don’t you do the booking next time?

Travel brings people closer probably because there is nowhere else to go. Differences, many have told me, are resolved in no time. This is true. Our last fight lasted a full five minutes. In between we exchanged unpleasant names, traded allegations, offered to walk back to the room alone and made derogatory references to exes. Soon we were laughing, holding hands and generally enjoying hygge in each other’s company. I don’t know if this sudden turnaround had anything to do with the fact that we were walking along a dark, deserted street by the sea in a beach town. But seriously, this was because we had travelled enough to understand that unresolved spats can make the rest of the journey cumbrous – who wants to pack the elephant in the room!

The second day we set out to explore Almora. We decided to give the usual attractions a miss but trace the Kosi which was down to a trickle. Along the way we would also scout for good locations for aerial photography. And for joints serving authentic Kumaoni food. Both of which took us longer than expected – fanning flames of impatience. Probably in the sullenness that ensued, we missed the turn to the Sun Temple at Katarmal – the only place we really wanted to visit. The town owes its origin to this temple as the earliest inhabitants were believed to be suppliers of sorrel for cleaning vessels of ablution. 

Being ‘hangry’ – angry and hungry – can cast its ugly spell for long even after you have been fed. It is a downward spiral with each trying to outpick the other. Reasons will present themselves – from juddering over an unseen hump to a badly taken twofie, taking a wrong turn and going around in circles to an ex cropping up as a heart on Instagram. Being snappy or defensive will only serve to inflame the situation. And silence can fester suspicion. After our road ritual of seeing the sun shut shop, we repaired into the car and started talking stuff. Since most of us suck at mind-reading, honest communication about true feelings and fears is of utmost importance. Compromise wherever you can. It is not really that difficult once you learn to prioritise – give precedence to other person’s feelings. Not just because that person can make or mar the trip for you but you are on the road with that person.

And open roads bring people closer. 

(All are aerial photographs of Almora shot by me using DJI Phantom 4 Pro. Any reproduction should be with written permission. Hey, its really easy.)